|
Singer
|
 |
« Reply #15 on: 11/19/07, 11:05 PM » |
|
like Ian and Chris are saying, wait till near the end of the semester. Drop some hints or just ask if he'd like to do something sometime...maybe ask in the last class. Either way I would ask him out or something before he graduates and disappears. It's easier to know if he has mutual feelings or not, rather than never knowing what could of been.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ITGIRL07
|
|
« Reply #16 on: 11/19/07, 11:16 PM » |
|
Would you say it's better to find out that he has no interest at all than to keep the hope that he could? This guy has been the only pleasant thing about this semester and I sort of hate to think that that could be taken away by a simple "No." I also wonder if taking up something new at finals is a good idea...he's got to have some difficult finals coming up and I know I'll be struggling with several of mine..  |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
Singer
|
|
« Reply #17 on: 11/19/07, 11:24 PM » |
|
Would you say it's better to find out that he has no interest at all than to keep the hope that he could? This guy has been the only pleasant thing about this semester and I sort of hate to think that that could be taken away by a simple "No." I also wonder if taking up something new at finals is a good idea...he's got to have some difficult finals coming up and I know I'll be struggling with several of mine.. I've been through the whole "does she/he like me?" thing too (most have). I personally think knowing whether or not someone shares the same or similar feelings towards you is better than torturing yourself with "what if's". If he does, great, go out and see what happens. If he says no, then yea...it'll hurt. It always does. (Yet, even if he said no...you still never know what will happen later on in life.) But from there you can move on, instead of dwelling on it. I'm sure there is time around finals to do something, or definitely after. Is there a big rush for this to happen? Take your time and don't come on too strong, but don't let it slip away. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ITGIRL07
|
|
« Reply #18 on: 11/19/07, 11:54 PM » |
|
No, there's no rush; quite the opposite. I've never dated before, but I've seen guys I used to like get involved with serious girlfriends and ever marry, so I know what the hurt can be like; that's why I'm not to anxious to experience it again. Also, it seems that every time I think of how great he is, I can't help but think that there's no real reason for him to like me and there's no reason for a senior to tie himself to a freshman.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
Chris
|
|
« Reply #19 on: 11/20/07, 01:02 AM » |
|
You could even ask what classes he's TAing next semester as a segway to talking about stuff not directly to your class. Maybe then ask him why he got into grad school to begin with and why he decided to TA. After that you've already had a conversation not directly relating to your class and then move from there. Then maybe as a "thank you" for all the help he's given you this semester offer to treat him to a lunch or something like that just to get out of the academic setting. Just see where it goes from there.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ian
|
|
« Reply #20 on: 11/21/07, 01:51 AM » |
|
You could even ask what classes he's TAing next semester as a segway to talking about stuff not directly to your class. Maybe then ask him why he got into grad school to begin with and why he decided to TA. After that you've already had a conversation not directly relating to your class and then move from there. Then maybe as a "thank you" for all the help he's given you this semester offer to treat him to a lunch or something like that just to get out of the academic setting. Just see where it goes from there.
I like Chris's idea. Most importantly you don't want to come on too strong to scare him off, however you want him to know that have an interest in him. Ease into it slowly so if you get the feeling he's not interested you can back off and still save face. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
Brii™ FTW
|
|
« Reply #21 on: 11/22/07, 05:55 PM » |
|
Honestly, if you like him as much as you say you do.. I would invite him out for something to eat after class maybe to "help you study" and see how things go from there
If he's not interested in you, you don't get embarrassed because it was just a casual thing. And if he is, who knows where things could go.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ITGIRL07
|
|
« Reply #22 on: 11/23/07, 01:13 AM » |
|
That's a good idea, Brii, and I'd like to try it, but it seems like he's always going somewhere after class ends. I think he may commute to campus because his destination seems to always be a bus stop (which I know because I've walked to it with him as he's explained stuff to me on the way out of class). I feel bad taking up so much of his time, especially considering all the coursework he must have; he's been on the dean's list every semester, though, so he must manage quite well : )
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
Brii™ FTW
|
|
« Reply #23 on: 11/23/07, 01:24 AM » |
|
Well, If you cant find him after class, maybe play a little stupid and act like you really cant figure something out and then ask for his help :-p
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ITGIRL07
|
|
« Reply #24 on: 11/23/07, 01:35 AM » |
|
I don't think playing stupid is the answer. It seems like a deception and it would make me seem less likeable. Honestly, would you prefer a stupid guy to an intelligent guy? I wouldn't, so I don't think that acting dumb will help. I might ask for some sort of clarification, but I can't see making myself seem dumb just to attract a guy who may or may not care about me.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ian
|
|
« Reply #25 on: 11/23/07, 01:39 AM » |
|
I don't think playing stupid is the answer. It seems like a deception and it would make me seem less likeable. Honestly, would you prefer a stupid guy to an intelligent guy? I wouldn't, so I don't think that acting dumb will help. I might ask for some sort of clarification, but I can't see making myself seem dumb just to attract a guy who may or may not care about me.
I think you're overthinking it again. Just use what people in here have told you as guidelines. If whatever you do seems too "rehearsed" it will just come out awkward. |
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
Chris
|
|
« Reply #26 on: 11/23/07, 04:05 AM » |
|
Exactly I think the key things here are just making sure you let him know how you feel without coming on too strong. The rest is just finding the right time to do it.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ITGIRL07
|
|
« Reply #27 on: 11/26/07, 05:11 PM » |
|
The timing is a problem and not just because I have to find a time at the end of class before the end of the semester. There's a girl in the class who I talk to occasionally before lecture (days with the professor, not the TA) and she tends to hang around. She hangs around after the TA's class to talk to me and even goes to his office hours, so I have virtually no time alone with him and if I try to shag her off I'm afraid I'll create more problems for myself. Thoughts/suggestions?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ian
|
|
« Reply #28 on: 11/26/07, 09:51 PM » |
|
is it possible she also has an interest in him?
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
ITGIRL07
|
|
« Reply #29 on: 11/26/07, 10:26 PM » |
|
I doubt it. She all ready has a boyfriend and is generally frustrated with the TA. She typically leaves the moment after her questions are answered and doesn't go out of her way to be with him. If anything, I'd say she's around because she's seriously in danger of not passing the class.
|
|
|
|
|
Logged
|
|
|
|
|
|
